Someday you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again. (Gowman)
Once upon a time very long ago and in a land far away, or maybe it was just next door, lived a little girl who had a very large phoophoonikkee. No one knew why it was so large but they did know that it made her do very strange things.
The Nice-Friendly-Sweet-Smart Little Girl’s name was Suzy Bell.
Suzy Bell lived in a purple house with red shutters and a crooked stovepipe. Apple trees bent low over the house, and often Suzy Bell could hear them whisper to her at night. She had a fat dog with a long nose named Alfred, and a striped cat with no tail named Tennis Shoe. And she had NO friends, even though she was nice-friendly-sweet-and-smart. She had no friends because they all made fun of her large phoophoonikkee and the strange things that it made her do.
If you’re wondering right now what these strange things were, we can tell you that Suzy Bell had the ability, with the help of her large phoophoonikkee, to transport herself to anywhere in the world she wanted to go. She could be a boy instead of a girl. She could fly. She could be a movie star. Or the President!
She could do all sorts of wildly improbable, fantastical, unbelievable, very strange things.
If her mother cried, or if her father drank too much and yelled, or if her friends mocked her, Suzy Bell’s phoophoonikkee started to grow. And it grew, and it grew, and it grew until it was so large that Suzy Bell started to slowly float up to the ceiling, and then she would pop right out of the roof. She was always very careful to take Alfred and Tennis Shoe with her because they were her only friends and because she loved them so much.
One day, maybe it was yesterday or last Tuesday, Suzy Bell had a Very Bad Day. She failed her spelling test. When she got home, she found her parents yelling at each other because her father had lost his job, and when he left, she knew he would come home in the way that she hated the most. Her mother cried and went to her room.
And Suzy Bell’s phoophoonikkee started to grow. She grabbed Alfred and Tennis Shoe before she started to float up to the ceiling, and she was very glad because she wanted to go far away. But this time, something different and Very Strange happened. Suzy Bell’s phoophoonikkee was not acting the way it always had in the past.
Suzy Bell, clutching her two best friends in the world tightly to her chest, her eyes shut, impatiently waiting to float away, suddenly realized that NOTHING HAPPENED!!! Nothing happened. Suzy Bell repeated shutting and opening her eyes . . . nothing!
Panicked, she began to cry great big alligator tears. She cried and cried and cried. So MUCH did Suzy Bell cry that her tears were making bigger and bigger puddles on the floor. So much water! Soon she began to float and still she held her two best friends tightly. Her eyes grew wide with fright when she realized that she COULDN’T SWIM!!!! She cried out, “Oh, I WISH I HAD A BOAT!!!”
(to be continued)