Bread when I’m hungry . . . A shelter from troubled winds . . . An anchor in life’s ocean . . . (Don Williams)
The gentleman of easy-listenin’ country music, Don Williams, got it right with his images of friendship. Having lost four of my best friends in recent years, and with several others living far away and/or coping with painful situations, I can’t express how much I miss them. And how much I long for the closeness of that kind of friendship. . .
Many years ago, some friends and I put together a little book on friendship, in which we tried to express what fun being friends was, the shared joy and laughter and sheer pleasure in being together. Following are some excerpts:
A Friend . . .
-always says your hair looks good, and never notices the “roots.”
-agrees that the camera adds at least 20 pounds, and says, “Oh, those jeans are always a little tight when they come out of the dryer.”
-is always glad to see you, and can make you feel better just by walking into a room.
-makes any day a special day.
-gets enthusiastic about your ideas.
-shares secrets and friends with you.
-has unplanned adventures with you.
-understands your neuroses, cuts your pie and makes your coffee perfect, and folds your towels the way you fold them.
-keeps quiet when you go off on your latest nutritional tangent — maybe even joins you.
-never lets you move into that “stockings around your ankles” stage of absent-mindedness.
-understands your sensitive areas.
-never repeats a confidence, even without being asked.
-never says “I told you so.”
-keeps in touch over the years, and cherishes your letters and phone calls.
-laughs with you even when she doesn’t know what you’re laughing about.
-will drive miles to have coffee-on-the-porch with you at 5 a.m..
-waits with bated breath for your next idea, and remembers your mutterings.
-likes everything you cook, and knows what not to cook for you.
-never tells you anything “for your own good,” and always knows when and where to tell you the truth, and when to keep quiet.
-listens to your dreams, maybe even interprets them!
-gives you magic wands.
-keeps you grounded.
-enjoys your sense of humor, and even understands it!
-accepts you exactly as you are.
-remembers with you.
-“loves” your animals, understands your relatives, and puts up with your spouse and/or pets (but maybe not in that order!)
-understands when you go to bed at 7:30 p.m. during her New Year’s Eve party.
– knows what you really mean when you say, “I’m going to bed to read.”
-surprises you with something special even when it’s not your birthday.
– never says, “yes, you did,” when you ask “have I told you this story?”
– laughs at your jokes with you, no matter how many times you’ve told them.
-overlooks your lack of tact, and all those faux pas.
-actually enjoys looking at your photographs.
-lets you drive her new car.
-commiserates about your aches and pains, and puts up with any and all whining.
-helps you spend your money.
-has her aura photographed with you.
-likes and encourages your “artwork.”
-watches your luggage for you at the airport when you have to go to the bathroom, and keeps your pets when you travel.
-travels with you.
-politely looks away when you swig Pepto-Bismol straight from the bottle.
-remembers your birthday, and celebrates with you, in person or not.
– listens, shares, cares, encourages, and is always there for you through all your ups and downs.
-strips 35 coats of paint from your kitchen cupboards, and smiles while doing it.
-winds your cuckoo clock for you, for real, and “metaphorically-speaking.”
-farm-sits for you, is your maid/cook/yard-person while a house guest, and cleans the cat hairs at least a little when you’re coming back from a trip.
– brings you chocolate.
-sits in the back of the car when necessary — with the dogs!
-tells you when you have spinach between your teeth, and if you need to tone down the makeup.
-makes the sun shine on a cloudy day.
-accepts you exactly as you are, will do anything for you, and supports you during life’s adventures.
(Dedicated to all those friends, old and new, in this world or the next, who have graced my life with their friendship and given me the gift of being able to share their love and laughter, and especially to all those who put this little book together back in 1995. You are, and have been, bread when I’m hungry, a shelter from troubled winds, and an anchor in life’s ocean. I wish you were all here, and I love you always!)